Tag Archives: culture

Homeless in Kilis; an influx from Syria.

15 Feb

Kilis, Turkey has recently received a vast influx of Syrians seeking safety after recent bombardments of Aleppo.

A mother cries with her children as they stand with their few belongings wondering where they can go.

A mother cries with her children as they stand with their few belongings wondering where they can go.

On any given evening you can find a lady crying on the cold streets of Kilis with her children with a heartbreaking story of survival and loss to tell you.

Kilis refugee camp is full, and there is no other place for Syrians to go. They are finding themselves on the streets with nowhere to go, many finding themselves with no place to pay their heads but on the streets of Kilis.

Syrians are huddled into empty shops, abandoned garages, and anywhere else they can go. Each evening you can find an abundance of Syrians sleeping in the bus station, while day-by-day they are constantly passing through trying to find a place to go.

1000’s of Syrians have entered Kilis in the past week, and the constant stream of people needing assistance certainly has no end in sight.

Around 50 Syrians huddle into this small space together to sleep

Around 50 Syrians crowd into this small space together to call this abandoned shop home for now.

Huddled together for warmth in an empty shop with over 50 people sleeping tightly packed together a young man shares with us his struggles, he has children to feed, along with his wife, and parents to care for. Even thought he is well educated he is unable to find a place to rent at a cheap price and more importantly work; the common tale for Syrians in neighbouring countries.

A woman assists her husband who is an amputee due to complications with diabetes to use the toilet; where is the toilet? It is a small bucket in the open public amongst Syrians outside of the local bus station; they no longer have the opportunity to even keep their dignity. Her husband has no insulin left and they are left with the streets to sleep trying to find a way to go to Istanbul where they hope for a better life.

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Young girls cry as they share their pains from their suffering and loss in Syria.

Aa a young girl cries, she tells me just one simple sentence as she struggles to get her words out from her tears, “I just want us to be one again in Syria”, she continues to share how she misses her father and older sister who has been missing for 2 months now & they have no idea where she is. 

Such simple words she shares with such an impact, a girl of just 14 years old, years ahead in maturity, like many children from Syria now, and a simple message of hope for us to be one in our world. Her tears are an overwhelming abundance of pain. There are few children from Syria who are not holding pain in the hearts nowadays.

Syrians entering Turkey from Bab Al Salam border crossing as the sounds of gunfire echo in the air.

Syrians entering Turkey from Bab Al Salam border crossing as the sounds of gunfire echo in the air.

Standing at Bab Al Salam border, or in Kilis refugee camp you can often hear the fighting a short distance away, a sound that no longer makes children shudder in fear, a sound they are much accustomed to at this stage. The only question I seem to get is where is the help for them they hear about so often in the media? Where is all of the money? Where is the UN? A long list of the same questions I have had thrown my way for the past 2 years now.
I sadly have no answers for them as I am unable to find a UN presence offering hands on assistance past wanting to gather the stories of tragedy for their records, there is a great lack of support for the Syrians who have recently fled Syria, I can only find local collections of people trying to help, and my own organisation now trying to offer what assistance we can.

Thousands have entered Turkey through Bab Al Salam in the past week, with thousands more having had to take dangerous, illegal crossings as they do not hold passports & they recently stopped allowing Syrians to enter without passports.

I found an elderly lady crying in the streets of Kilis with her hand badly cut open and clothing torn after a dangerous and scary journey for her, she injured herself on the barbed wire leaving Syria. She cried saying she had done nothing wrong, her home was destroyed and she had nowhere to go, what can she do.

There is no sight to an end to the war in Syria, a minimum of around 6000 people are leaving Syria daily, many with nowhere to go and millions displaced.

I cannot quite describe what it feels like to see people starving, cold, scared and with no security in any way. It leaves me sleepless, it leaves me with guilt, it leaves me to only wonder what on earth is happening in our world and why are we 3 years into a war in Syria, nearly half of the country having fled for assistance elsewhere, and countless dead. How on earth is this possible.

I don’t meet any Syrian in Kilis who has just crossed without a terrible sadness to share with me, they just lost their child, their wife, their husband, all so fresh and without time to even heal from their pains as they have to instantly struggle for survival on the streets of Kilis.

Homeless in Kilis.

Homeless in Kilis. A young Syrian girl finds herself on the streets of Kilis having recently left Syria.

From the young children to the elderly, every soul of Syria has their story and every story matters in our world. Every soul matters in our world.

These people coming to Kilis right now, and across every border are the people who matter, the civilians, those who are important and forgotten often in war. Please think of the people.
Nobody should be homeless in our world; a world of such vast resources, grandeur and wealth that doesn’t seem to hold equality.

I will share more from Kilis shortly, things are just very busy right now and I wanted to share something in this moment. All I can ask is for one simple thing…

Remember humanity in our world. Please.

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What Happened to Love?

19 Sep

I’m talking about love, not that word that is thrown around on a daily basis holding no depth, that emotion that few lucky people get to experience in entirety in our world. We have love of many forms in our world, but I am talking about that once in a lifetime bond with another, that special something that connects us and give us pure safety in every ounce of our being.

Across the world, no matter where I go, love is missing. Cheating, deceit lies and more on top of that are the way of life, and what has become a normal in society tragically.

What happened to respecting your body, your soul, your heart? What happened that these hold no value; in my lifetime I have never known it to hold value.

Are we so afraid to jump so big and chase a dream emotion with someone who tickles our heart, or are we lonely beings as humans that just crave any human contact instead of dealing with our inner insecurities that bring us comfort to be alone and wait for something that special?

As I travel, I look around and get inundated with emotionally draining & heart wrenching life stories, I rarely hear a true love story, and when I do I cling to it.

I recently met a couple who have in total waited 14 years to be with one another. I have never seen such smiles and joy as I did at their wedding. It has moved me so deeply, through tragedy and struggle for over 10 years; this couple fought for love against all the odds and now have that special bond with no regrets of waiting for one another, it has touched me so much that this family is part of an upcoming film I am making now.

If I told you the full story you would be in tears. This is what saddens me; we are so touched by great love stories because they are that rare and we as humans in our world have made them that rare.

People have always thought I am an odd girl, chasing dreams, chasing a fantasy of once in a lifetime love, yet I confront and deal with the worst human crisis in our world, the older I grow and especially with my work surrounded by such tragedy frequently, I only stand stronger to my beliefs and morals on these matters, of which I am proud of. We have nothing if we do not have love I feel.

Young people cry to me over mistakes they have made, older people cry to me over mistakes they have made, stories of in one weekend they were in love, slept with the person and it was over that following week. This is the societies we live in sadly, but it seems not enough fight against this, people complain they want more and that once in a lifetime feeling but they don’t live by it, they don’t respect their body and soul.

I want to say to any female or male feeling insecure, feeling lonely, feeling lost and craving love that it is ok. All comes to those who wait, all comes when the time is right and that is the fact of it. Once day you will have someone special in your life, one day you will have it all so wait, wait for someone special and respect yourself.

Don’t live in lies; don’t live being who you are not. Don’t drag someone else into your mess if you cannot give them honesty, find yourself and do this alone without harming another with false promises of emotions, and don’t turn to resentment if you have been lied upon and do this to another.

If you think you are happy sleeping around, I can promise you that you are not. You may not know that now but one day you will find that and end up in regrets. If you think sex is happiness in your life then you are not living. We all have desires, we all crave physical contact, but we all crave most of all to wake up next to another who truly cares for us.

We don’t want to be alone on our death-bed, yet so many are, and so many lead a life leading to this. We want to feel butterflies when someone says our name, we want to know someone cares for us so deeply they live their life for us and they don’t even have to say it. We all want to have someone next to us we are so enamoured by as we fall asleep. We all want to laugh, cry, and be held when times are tough. We wat to plan trips with that partner who understands us and loves us for us through the good and bad in us, we all want true passion in every form of it, we all want a partner in the true meaning of it, and no matter what country I go to this is the missing key to life that everyone craves.

I work in cultures sometimes where this bond is not allowed to grow. I meet people so trapped by their religion that they are pushed into marriages unhappily. I meet people who live by stories I can tell them of emotions and love and life and it breaks my heart they have to live through someone else to feel anything because they are not granted the freedom to feel.
Then I look at Western cultureS and feel so sickened that they are granted all the freedom in the world and it is abused so greatly with lack of self respect, sex with people whose names are forgotten soon thereafter, and I just feel so saddened at the missing links across the world.

Live well, live true and respect yourself. I talk frequently with youth and teenagers and have over the years, and many have come back to me a little more grown up saying they wish they didn’t conform to society and pressures they had felt to sleep around and not love themselves. People try to tell you that you can’t be alone and just meet someone nice and good to you, no, wait for love I say, true love and when it comes it will hit you so hard that you won’t be able to run from it no matter what you try.

Love yourself, love your being. Don’t try to compensate for love, wait for that special feeling, love will come and it will be worth waiting for in every way. If you live in a culture where you are allowed to explore feelings of your own be so thankful, if you are in a culture where you are trapped from having self-expression of emotions then my heart cries for you, all the people I have met and all the love stories I have had shared to me, it breaks my heart how much love is disrespected.

If you have that special feeling for someone then jump big against all the odds. If someone is on your mind continually hold no fear in declaring it regardless of what may come back in return. Share your love, share your feelings and care nothing for what another thinks. Be love and if you are now happily married or getting there because true love has come your way then you have my every congratulations and advice to never let it go and even through the hard times, remember they only make you stronger together and never give up. If something is easy in life it is not worth a dime.

If you once thought you had love but it is gone, it is ok, it wasn’t the real thing, and if it was it will come back, in the meantime brush yourself off, remember you again, never forget your worth. You live, you learn and something better is always awaiting you. Most of all, don’t let it change you, learn what you do not want to be from a bad experience only.

Our world is missing love in many ways. Be a part of a world where love exists in every form, from your personal life to the love of humanity, spread love, and respect that word with what it truly means. Our life is so precious, love is so precious, and truly could be taken from us tomorrow, live for love.

Rape in Syria

2 Mar

Rape has always been a dominate weapon in war. Rape in any circumstance is a horrendous, disgusting act; when you add the violence in rape that happens within a war, it brings it to yet another sickening low act that is beyond the imagination. Rape and sexual abuses are committed frequently in Syria, however are highly under reported.

Rape has always held a stigma attached to it of shame in the Middle East and through religion this is heightened. Rape holds a stigma wrongly attached to it worldwide of course. In the Muslim culture at times with rape cases, the victims can often be forced to married their rapist, have their children, and do not have a voice in this matter. They are given a feeling of shame. Rape in war currently from Syria has brought a business of selling these victims as brides, trafficking rings have been set up, a money-making trade has been made out of these victims from Syria.

What I will also point out as many people misunderstand Muslim culture, this is not how every Muslim feels about rape, or deals with the crisis happening with this, like any culture and religion there are the good and bad within it. There are Muslims assisting these victims as much as they can in the right way too.

Rape in Syria is currently happening not only to females, but males also, however, males will never speak about this matter tragically to get the help they require.

Girls suffering from rape; and I do want to emphasise girls are in need of serious help, some cases are even as young as 7 years old (I have personally dealt with one case at this age), with age of cases I have dealt with mostly from Syria are predominately between 11-20 years old. Not only are these girls raped there is a great deal of violence within the rape, many have already witnessed horrific atrocities happening, some have witnessed their own loved ones being killed and are then raped, abused and tortured in highly intrusive sexual manners. Brutality which includes being prodded with a hot rod in their genital region, mice being used are commonly reported as being inserted into these victims, and many other disturbing, and brutal methods of torture are being used to harm these victims.

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Many girls are scared and try to hide it from their own loved ones where possible, they are living with this shameful feeling within themselves. The suffering they have gone through with this horrendous situation, to then in some cases to find they are pregnant at times and are also being sold as brides.
These victims feel worthless, like they are unable to marry, have children, they are feeling like their life is over and in many cases wishing for death to knock upon their door as they can see no life ahead of them. Some organisations are providing what they feel is assistance by selling these girls as brides as a charitable act.

I have two particular cases that are strong in my memory always. One being what I previously touched on briefly in my last blog, and another being a girl so scared from her religion and family, even though I knew her own family would have assisted her, she turned to religion heavily, not allowing any men to see her at all, and covering everything, even her hands if she went out anywhere, her own mother did not wear a headscarf on normal occasions. I was lucky to be able to meet her to assist her in the appropriate way so she no longer had to keep this all in her mind.

We have problems now with trafficking of Syrian girls, some due to them being raped and deemed worthless, some as their families feel they are doing right marrying them off from a life in a refugee camp. There are many reasons for this. There is a major problem of girls being used as prostitutes, girls being dumped when unwanted in certain Arab countries and thrown into brothels. The problems happening currently are out of control and need better assistance from our world to be stopped.

Can you imagine being a child, having watched your family be murdered to then be raped repeatedly & graphically tortured in the most revolting ways imaginable, to then be possibly sold as a bride or used as a prostitute? I am sure you fail to imagine this or connect to this on any level. I remember turning 13 and recalling worrying about whether my school bag would have been cool to fit in with the cool kids, worry about my hair style, running around in fields picking wild raspberries. I am sure most of you have many childhood stories of your ‘worries’. Can you imagine being back in that age and thinking of the graphic rape you have just suffered through, the loved ones you have lost and feeling unable to speak, and then if you possibly do speak, the chances are you will end up in a wealthy Arab state as an extra wife, or used as a prostitute. This is what is happening in many instances right now as you read this.

Rape is now being committed by both sides of the fighting in Syria. It is used as a weapon of war for many reasons. Reasons that I would like to think the majority of us will never be able to adhere to such comprehension. What we need to focus on primarily is getting these victims the help they need, not judging them upon their sect of religion from Syria, or which side may have committed the crime and so forth.

Sadly I personally cannot stop rape crimes being committed in our world, but I do know what we can do as humans who should care for humanity and take the appropriate steps to dealing with rape in war. We can assist these victims in the appropriate manner without judgements of religion, culture or any of the barriers in our world.

If you have been a victim of rape, you are not a person who should hold shame in any way. You need to know you are a beautiful being in our world and have not done anything wrong. You are someone important in our world. You do not deserve to be treated as a victim who should be ashamed. You deserve the right support for what you have had to tragically suffer through. You deserve protection, care to recover mentally and physically, care without judgements.

I have worked with quite a few rape cases from Syria in the past year, my mind cannot comprehend the trauma these girls have suffered for the simple reasons being I do not, and do not ever wish to understand the minds of these sick individuals and groups committing these crimes. I do find it hard to sleep most nights knowing the monstrous acts that have been shared with me by many victims. I can only think constantly, and I hope many of you will agree with me; what is wrong with our world? Why are we allowing these crimes to happen? What more can we do?

I ask you to focus on what is happening in our world. Syria is facing one of the worst crisis in more recent history. There are many issues happening across our world, I ask you to take action, stand up against these matters, make a change, we can all make a change no matter where we are.

We are all doing something wrong in our world if victims of rape in war are being sold as worthless beings. We are all doing something wrong in our world if we are not opening our eyes & hearts to this matter. We are all doing something wrong if we do not take action to make a change.

Rape is only one of many war crimes being committed in Syria of course, but is the most sensitive and is lacking support. We need to focus on the assistance of victims from the crisis in Syria, and this is not being done enough.

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Children are suffering internally from being witness to barbarity without the appropriate treatment for their future, women without support living in fear of sharing what has happened to them, men who have been tortured in such explicit conduct that bury it so deep internally, the list is truly endless, never mind the injured who are not getting the support they need either. There are so many problems not being addressed sufficiently from the crisis of Syria.

There are organisations of course set up to assist with these victims of rape; however, it is proving ineffective for several reasons, and also depending on how you look at the right way of deal with rape may be.

5-10% of the crimes happening in Syria are reported. There is so much more happening that is not being shown, and we need to work together for humanity to show these crimes, assist with these matters and bring help in the right way. I am shocked constantly speaking to people, general citizens in various countries surprised that I am speaking about a war in Syria who say in shock ‘are they still having problems?’

Please take notice of the crisis in our world.

This is the most sensitive topic within the war to deal with; the point is that we can deal with it and it is time we did.

Truth – Peace – Love.