Tag Archives: lessons

Homeless in Kilis; an influx from Syria.

15 Feb

Kilis, Turkey has recently received a vast influx of Syrians seeking safety after recent bombardments of Aleppo.

A mother cries with her children as they stand with their few belongings wondering where they can go.

A mother cries with her children as they stand with their few belongings wondering where they can go.

On any given evening you can find a lady crying on the cold streets of Kilis with her children with a heartbreaking story of survival and loss to tell you.

Kilis refugee camp is full, and there is no other place for Syrians to go. They are finding themselves on the streets with nowhere to go, many finding themselves with no place to pay their heads but on the streets of Kilis.

Syrians are huddled into empty shops, abandoned garages, and anywhere else they can go. Each evening you can find an abundance of Syrians sleeping in the bus station, while day-by-day they are constantly passing through trying to find a place to go.

1000’s of Syrians have entered Kilis in the past week, and the constant stream of people needing assistance certainly has no end in sight.

Around 50 Syrians huddle into this small space together to sleep

Around 50 Syrians crowd into this small space together to call this abandoned shop home for now.

Huddled together for warmth in an empty shop with over 50 people sleeping tightly packed together a young man shares with us his struggles, he has children to feed, along with his wife, and parents to care for. Even thought he is well educated he is unable to find a place to rent at a cheap price and more importantly work; the common tale for Syrians in neighbouring countries.

A woman assists her husband who is an amputee due to complications with diabetes to use the toilet; where is the toilet? It is a small bucket in the open public amongst Syrians outside of the local bus station; they no longer have the opportunity to even keep their dignity. Her husband has no insulin left and they are left with the streets to sleep trying to find a way to go to Istanbul where they hope for a better life.

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Young girls cry as they share their pains from their suffering and loss in Syria.

Aa a young girl cries, she tells me just one simple sentence as she struggles to get her words out from her tears, “I just want us to be one again in Syria”, she continues to share how she misses her father and older sister who has been missing for 2 months now & they have no idea where she is. 

Such simple words she shares with such an impact, a girl of just 14 years old, years ahead in maturity, like many children from Syria now, and a simple message of hope for us to be one in our world. Her tears are an overwhelming abundance of pain. There are few children from Syria who are not holding pain in the hearts nowadays.

Syrians entering Turkey from Bab Al Salam border crossing as the sounds of gunfire echo in the air.

Syrians entering Turkey from Bab Al Salam border crossing as the sounds of gunfire echo in the air.

Standing at Bab Al Salam border, or in Kilis refugee camp you can often hear the fighting a short distance away, a sound that no longer makes children shudder in fear, a sound they are much accustomed to at this stage. The only question I seem to get is where is the help for them they hear about so often in the media? Where is all of the money? Where is the UN? A long list of the same questions I have had thrown my way for the past 2 years now.
I sadly have no answers for them as I am unable to find a UN presence offering hands on assistance past wanting to gather the stories of tragedy for their records, there is a great lack of support for the Syrians who have recently fled Syria, I can only find local collections of people trying to help, and my own organisation now trying to offer what assistance we can.

Thousands have entered Turkey through Bab Al Salam in the past week, with thousands more having had to take dangerous, illegal crossings as they do not hold passports & they recently stopped allowing Syrians to enter without passports.

I found an elderly lady crying in the streets of Kilis with her hand badly cut open and clothing torn after a dangerous and scary journey for her, she injured herself on the barbed wire leaving Syria. She cried saying she had done nothing wrong, her home was destroyed and she had nowhere to go, what can she do.

There is no sight to an end to the war in Syria, a minimum of around 6000 people are leaving Syria daily, many with nowhere to go and millions displaced.

I cannot quite describe what it feels like to see people starving, cold, scared and with no security in any way. It leaves me sleepless, it leaves me with guilt, it leaves me to only wonder what on earth is happening in our world and why are we 3 years into a war in Syria, nearly half of the country having fled for assistance elsewhere, and countless dead. How on earth is this possible.

I don’t meet any Syrian in Kilis who has just crossed without a terrible sadness to share with me, they just lost their child, their wife, their husband, all so fresh and without time to even heal from their pains as they have to instantly struggle for survival on the streets of Kilis.

Homeless in Kilis.

Homeless in Kilis. A young Syrian girl finds herself on the streets of Kilis having recently left Syria.

From the young children to the elderly, every soul of Syria has their story and every story matters in our world. Every soul matters in our world.

These people coming to Kilis right now, and across every border are the people who matter, the civilians, those who are important and forgotten often in war. Please think of the people.
Nobody should be homeless in our world; a world of such vast resources, grandeur and wealth that doesn’t seem to hold equality.

I will share more from Kilis shortly, things are just very busy right now and I wanted to share something in this moment. All I can ask is for one simple thing…

Remember humanity in our world. Please.

WWW.TRUTHPEACELOVE.ORG

Helping Humanity, Open your Heart for Syria.

14 Jan

Recently, I have been going through files from Syria in 2012. I came across this picture and it brought back so many memories.

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I had gone on yet another trip inside; I was planning on 1-2 days in Aleppo after Idlib, this was at the beginning of the troubles in Aleppo, before it went to mainstream media, when it was still very much in the hands of the regime and not the opposition. I decided to go into the centre, things were very different at the time upon going into the centre, I won’t go into much detail of it, but, there were no Free Syrian Army groups going back and forth at the time, everything was silent of this, everything was with regime checkpoints in the centre, not FSA checkpoints.

About 8 days later, after no communication with those few on the outside who knew what I was working on inside, no emails, no phones, nothing, let’s just say I had landed in a far from safe situation, I was out to Idlib border again,  back to being able to breathe, feel safe for that time frame. I won’t go into great details of everything day to day.

I let kids use my camera when resting, in family homes and so forth, it brings them a moment of joy from the boredom the poor children have to suffer through with no schools, no real freedom for play time and these things kids need. What I didn’t realise was this kid had listened to me speaking about what had happened and was paying close attention to the chats with the adults in the group. He took this snap, this was the moment I had phone communication again and relieved a lot of very worried people on the outside who were starting to think the worst. It was such a joyous moment and this brought me smiles as I reminisce over that trip. It then brings me great sadness.

During that trip, I had witnessed some of the most horrific scenes to date in Syria for me. Things that still haunt me, still shock me, things that I would wish no-one to see or experience.

It started with a 12-year-old girl who had been raped horrendously by what is known as the Shabiha, a militia group loyal to the Syrian regime. The Free Syrian Army had rescued her, she had witnessed her family murdered in front of her own eyes. They took her and continuously raped her, they used mice as part of shaming her, and prodded her with a hot rod type of item. Now, I won’t go into the tragic details of this crime, but you may find it hard to believe. How could anyone do this to a little girl I thought as she shared her horror with me, myself in the moment even in so much shock trying to believe her story. With just her and I in the room, she was being treated for her wounds, she was crying, wishing for death as what man would ever want her, she called herself a monster now, she could never have children, her family are all gone, what did she have to live for she questioned me, the tragedy that was before me was beyond comprehension. I tried to comfort her, I tried to calm her, she lifted her gown and blankets from the hospital bed she lay on and shouted at me to look at her disfigurement.

I had lost any right to question her story she shared with me in that moment as I fought to hold back my every emotion in front of her.

Rape is not something spoken about openly in the Muslim culture; it’s difficult for someone to speak about from any culture, but no culture as difficult as the Arab nations.

Rape is happening more frequently than can ever be documented in Syria currently, including men suffering sexual abuses.

Continuing that trip, there was tragedy after tragedy in all the regions I travelled to. Everyone not without their tragic story to share, places of terror, fear, the unknown that could happen at any moment with the fear of helicopters at the time circling as we would await them dropping out rockets. Descriptions I could never put into words, nor could anyone of what the situation is like inside.

These scenes are only worsening inside now. These tragedies are worsening daily, yet we are approaching 2 years of the troubles in Syria and it only continues to deteriorate while it seems humanity is lost in the world.

I only share this tiny glimpse into one of my trips into Syria as looking back at this file, seeing this picture, and remembering it all, as I do every trip I have made inside, I never forget everyone who helps me, everyone I meet, I just don’t share much publically about it, but I spoke to this little boy this morning and asked him if he remembered the pictures he took on my camera, he said yes of course, he loves my camera he said, and he asked me if I am happier now. I asked him why he asks me this, he said because when he met me I was very sad even though I was laughing and playing with his family. That saddened me even more that this boy, this family that I have not seen again since that trip remembers me, and that little boy takes the time to ask me how I am and if I am happy while his family are in great suffering, lacking food, further lives lost in their family while they lack clothing, blankets and so forth for winter.
I could share a thousand stories and more, as can anyone who has been inside, or any Syrian first and foremost who has suffered – each story is just as important as the other, every human life counts, this is not a statistic; yet this is how most know Syria and it’s tragedy as statistics.

This same trip one of the many families I had met with, a family who took me in for shelter for a short time and fed me, I had given a little girl bracelets as a gift, I always try to carry some small items I could give as gifts to children, I had 2 bracelets she liked, nothing special but she adored them, she asked me what they said, one was peace, one was love, (If you know me, it’s my motto through life and any jewellery I am wearing frequently has this written on it in some way…), so I say to her, Salam (Peace) and Hubb (Love). She said it was so beautiful, and we laughed as I ate with her and her family. I put them around her wrist and she asked me to promise to come and she her again, Inshallah (God willing incase you are not familiar with Arabic terms) I said, and I looked to her family and asked them why are they not leaving as they were in a very dangerous area and it was only a matter of time before it would be hit, I feared for them. This little girl was so precious, so smart, so loving, there was something about her that stuck with me, I think it was because she reminded me of myself when I was her age, she was so beautiful. She came running to me in tears as I was leaving, she was scared I would not visit her again and missed me already she said, and she gave me back the bracelets I gave her. We all were so surprised as the kids love to get gifts and she adored the little bracelets. She said she wanted me to wear them because she wants me to keep the Peace and Love with me as I travelled in Syria to be safe and wanted me to always remember her. After a lot of bickering and giggles, I put the bracelets on and she made me promise her I would never take them off. I never took them off since then. 2 days later I was in a different region and was told that the village was hit badly and there are many injured and killed including many children. Of course my first instinct was to think of Alaa, that little girl, that family who took me in. I requested to go back to that village to see what had happened, my heart sank as I returned to a now destroyed village. I went to the house that was where I sat days previously and laughed with a family, that house was rubble now. We asked around what happened, tried to find information, most fled to refugee camps so I presumed they had left there too. A man in the village remembered me, he was a neighbour of the family and had sat in for dinner with us, he told me to come with him, he took me to a graveyard, to Alaa’s grave. That little girl, just days prior I laughed with was killed as she was buried in rubble in her home. To this day I can’t believe it, but I don’t look at those bracelets the same anymore and I certainly never did take them off, until recently as they were getting badly damaged so I wanted to protect them to make sure I always had them, I replaced them with a small peace & love bracelet I can always wear to remember her.
Peace & Love
This is a frequent story in Syria sadly. It just hurts more as it would any human I would like to think when you meet the people personally, it adds a different level of upset to the situation.

The beauty in the hearts of the Syrian people is one that I cannot ever falter. It is not one that anyone will ever understand unless they have travelled to Syria, or lived in Syria or been working inside. Being any outside to the religion, yet being brought in and welcomed and assisted is something that is lacking great understanding to the outside world. Muslim’s get put under one big title in the world by those who lack education on the religion or live in little bubbles of Fox watching news turning a blind eye to the real world.

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Right now there are millions of humans suffering across our world, from many countries, cultures, religions. Right now though, Syria is suffering the worst humanitarian crisis possible.

No-one can imagine the suffering the people are going through, the tragedy that has happened and is happening. You see about 10% if you are lucky through the media. A lot more needs done.

We are here on this earth for humanity, to help one another in need. It is not about religion, not about race or anything alike, this is about humanity.

I am asking you for humanity, to please help in any humanitarian way you can. Please open your eyes, please donate what you can – financially, clothing, blankets, anything else to a local group that you trust is doing great work inside and / or in the refugee camps surrounding Syria. If you need advice on trusted groups in your country please get in touch I will be happy to guide you as there are sadly many who are profiting from war as always happens and cannot be trusted too, so please be sure to verify donations carefully. As some of you may know, I am starting my own organisation, and have received many donations of medical supplies, clothing and so forth to get through to those in need. I will not be ready to launch my organisation official until March roughly, but if you do wish to pass anything through I can direct it through me if this helps for those who know me. My organisation will be a different way of involving the world in bring aid to those in need, it will not be limited to Syria, it will be a worldwide organisation, however in the first year the prediction is we will only be aiding Syria through it.

Be thankful for all you have, for that phone call you were able to make today, for that cup of coffee you made yourself that you must have every morning or else you will have a conniption. Be thankful for life, for your children, your wife and your husband if you are lucky to have found love in this form. Be thankful for that bowl of cereal you had, for that lunch date you are going to have, for that vacation you are going on. Be thankful for the water running freely from your tap, for the joy of being able to sit in comfort and read this right now without worry.

Please don’t use the excuse well it’s not my country, they are not my family, they are not my people. This is disgusting to say and sadly I have heard this too many times for my liking. We are one in this world; we should always be reaching out a helping hand to another.

We live blessed lives, even your worst day is your best day, believe me. You are alive, that is enough to be thankful for, and with that, being alive means you are a human in this world and our duty as human’s are to help one another in need.

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I cannot fathom on any level what it would feel like to lose my child, to lose my father, my mother, my loved ones through horrors of war, and in such horrific and painful circumstances. I cannot nearly imagine how I would feel if my child was raped, tortured, beaten to death and worse. I am sure you cannot either. I have seen what it feels like for others first hand to face this, others who once had a normal life, a husband they would kiss goodbye to as they left to work, kids they would open the door to as they came home excited and playful after a day at school begging to go play before dinner, your everyday life, taken away from you, and if you are lucky to be alive still, you get to go and live in a dirty refugee camp, lacking all forms of aid.  Think about it, open your eyes.

Live a good honest life, please be more than what the world is conforming to be, cheating, lies, destruction and so forth. Please be more. Stand up for humanity; stand up as a human being. Spread Peace & Love, this starts in your heart and spreads one little bit at a time.

I share little glimpses here and there of small stories just to give a glimpse into a humanised side of things in Syria. If you are on my mailing list I share a lot more, but will from now on try to blog a lot more…

Be Truth, Be Peace, Be Love, Be Inspiring.

With Peace & Love,

Yasmin

Hate.

5 Oct

More lessons through life… A personal journey.

3 years ago I was still living in Los Angeles, so unhappy with the culture around me, desperately seeking depth, meaning, love in my life, seeking guidance in some form.
I was still acting and modelling, amongst too many other careers, working with different charities to help those in need, talent management, and starting the journey into documentaries and so forth. Earning good money, but so unhappy. Now, I am on a higher path in life I feel, and am so grateful for where it is and has led me. I know my work now benefits, will benefit further and his giving some help back into this world in any small way.
3 years ago on an evening out, I had also met some so lost in this world beyond anything I could ever imagine, someone delving so deeply into the false pleasures of this world to mask their own truths and confront their soul. Like most in Los Angeles I had met, they were another on the list of lost souls in that culture deluded by money, sex & power of which I held no interest in. They could not handle the rejection like many ego’s and chased and chased.
Long story short, I decided to look through this false life, believing in the good of others always, believing there was good within, and believing in their story of their life I later discovered was untrue. We ended up on a journey together, one I have recently come to learn was anything but what I was led to believe it was. This is just one example of many paths we cross in life, this story is just relevant to my life right now.
I owe great thanks to this soul though. I thought I could help them, guide them to a better way of being, living, of love in purity and innocence, things lost in this world and so seldom valued. I accepted them for all their past I find morally disagreeable in many ways. I failed in this and they are no more changed through time of our knowing one another. Venom pouring through every vein of their blood, their soul so tainted by hate from any damages they experience through their life. Running at every chance from any truth, leaving a trail of destruction and enjoying it as they do. A thread was pulled and unravelled the whole mask of who they were through life, truths I never thought I would have to deal with. So scared of truth, so scared of being one person, living many lives with different souls that could never cross paths in case the contradictions of their being are every further unravelled. I saw through all of this, and never bestow judgement on others for their rights, wrongs, goods or bads of living. It is not for me to judge, it is for me to learn through experiences. I accepted this soul into my life, as I always accept anyone into my life, and only ever issued forgiveness and understanding where I could. I could see the beauty in their soul that could shine through if they did not hold themselves back and lived openly without fear in life. A soul so consumed by a far past of youth that does not and had not appreciated the beauty in the here and now to strive for a beautiful future, beauty for them was trying to relive in a past daily, along with financial gains and sexual indugences.

They forgot fast the moments I was there in the true manners that matter, it’s like memories truly washed from their mind, not even just forgotten, it’s like they never existed. Tears from being financially broke and I showing that money meant nothing of true value and money do not equal care, and how good that felt, memories like opening to the world, memories of showing what truly matters, memories of feelings of belonging for once in their life, memories which inspired their own work, journeys that were so precious. Now all tainted by a delusion of hate. Deep inside though, they know the truth through the dark image they have painted, or at least I would like to keep believing.
I have faced many struggles in life, all of which I am grateful for. This soul has yet experience life in entirety I feel. Never had to struggle, never had to know what it is to make someone for yourself, by yourself, always had a great family of finances fed to them which gave great rights in their eyes to disrespect others whom don’t hold such blessings in life. Yet, I would never wish for this, I love that what I am working on now has my heart, my soul, my sweat, my every own finance I have struggled for through hard times to ensure I create it. I’m proud to say this at my age.
There is no greater beauty in life than growing with another soul, no greater beauty than someone loving you, caring for you, being there for you no matter who you are. No greater pleasure than a deep connection with someone to walk through this life with, but to fear such depth and run and turn it into venom with a blade that only harms oneself is just sadness to being I will never allow myself to be.
I have sought meaning on why we encounter such souls in life, all different souls in life; I firmly believe there is meaning to our encounters with everyone in life. We all learn lessons, or at least we should and put those good lessons to practice.
I learned what it is to be hated in life for nothing but giving love out recently, to be hated so deeply to have someone want to cause I harm in any form possible, to spend their time doing so, to spend their time feeding a poison instead of releasing it to look at truth.
I understand why people like this do such things in life, I understand why this has been done now.

This journey has taught me of hate, a toxic poison so harmful in life. It has taught me to never hold an ounce of it. It has taught me that it only harms that soul and hate breeds hate at the end of the day. I journey through my life very open about me. My rights, my wrongs, my beliefs, and I do this for me, I hold no care what another thinks of me, I seek no approval, as I know the right souls in life will care for me as me in my entirety.
I won’t cover all details of my personal being. I will only say that right now hate has caused me great harm in so many ways, but all ways of which I forgive in entirety, all of which are leading me greater to the paths I should have been on sooner.
I started my life from absolutely nothing. Literally. My home, my belongings, have all been consumed by a great fire of hate. If only you knew the full details, some do of my situation personally now. But, I bear no hate, no scars, only love sits in my heart and I shall never change in this. The more venom thrown my way, the more love I feel grow within as it keeps me so far away from ever wanting to be a person holding any form of hate. It’s such an ugly thing to wear.

With all of this, I offer my thanks for that hate, for teaching me who I was 3 years ago, seeking love, light, peace in life, seeking truth, seeking a better being. I discovered love in its purity. I discovered innocence in life, I discovered how precious our body, our soul, our mind, our hearts are, how these things are not to be given readily to anyone. I discovered what matters in life, true bonds, and true care.

I created much from nothing before in my life, and again I do so now. The struggle in life is all part of the journey; the struggle is where we learn. I now, more than ever have learned how important it is to banish hate from our world, to banish corruption, to expose truth. I dedicate my life to this now and only this now.
People can live in false pleasures, delve into a world of filth, sex, drink, drugs, prostitution, hate, damage, money, but deep inside this is not a soul who has peace and love within.
I wish all lost souls in life to find their way, to find what matters and never let that go, not run, to not fear life, to not fear love or anyone around, to live as you. Find meaning to life, we are all here to help one another in this world.

Sometimes the more love you throw at a venomous person, the more they spit back. Eventually, a day will come when they learn differently, we just must never become eaten by this flame, we must always give love and blessings to these lost souls.
That soul who taught me of hate, who taught me a lot in life, I will only ever offer my love to be sent their way. I will only ever keep them in my thoughts and wish they find what peace and love is and release a life’s worth of venom pent-up inside and start living purely and truly, and one day deal with the matters of his own child that he continues to run far away from, denying any existance of his own son, his own flesh and blood.

I will always hold my door open to them in a time of need, as I would any stranger in this earth if I am in a power to help. This is what life is about. Forgiveness & love.
I hold old-fashioned values & morals in life, I believe our bodies are so precious, I believe we meet one special person along our journey to fall in love in, a different kind of love of connection in body and soul. I still believe all of this as I get older. I believe waiting for this is worth more than anything, worth more than false pleasures than only shall eventually end in regrets. That bond of purity with another is more beautiful than anything in life.

We are not here to harm each other, we are here to help each other in life. From the harm I see in Syria upon others, upon little children I lack understand of how another can kill in such ways, but I also see it as the same as hate I have seen bestowed upon me and harm to bring me and a child also. There is no place for this in this world.

Nothing is greater than love in this world, and love has always and will always pull me through anything in life.
In this past month, I have met incredible souls from all walks of life, all religions, all cultures, all countries. It has been so beautiful. There is so much beauty in this world, and it must not be forgotten, we must try to bring beauty into the hearts of others.

I don’t want to sound like a hippy or anything, but spread love, peace, joy… It’s truly all that matters.
I have made many mistakes through my life myself, what matters is I can recognise them, accept them, and learn from them.

We all go through journeys in life, we must learn as we go, grow to be better souls, learn of great values, morals, the important of truth, of being one’s self, the important of love and cherishing those who show it. Respect yourself, your body, your mind, your soul.
I hope one day I can write again on this from the view of a soul swimming in hate whom has seen light. What beauty. I know it can be.

With Peace & Love, forever and for always…

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Yasmin x

“It is impossible to fall out of love,love is such a powerful emotion,that once it envelops you it does not depart.True love is eternal..If you think that you were once in love,but fell out of it, then it wasn’t love you were in..There are no ‘exit’ signs in love,there is only an ‘on’ ramp..”